Thursday, August 27, 2009

"Locked?" By Patrilla Hardy

"My heart beats rapidly as i muster up the courage to confess wat's heavy on my heart. My mind is flooded with a million thoughts, yet with every thought the only focus is YOU. I am emotionally discombobulated because i truthfully wish these feelings would disappear. I do not want nor do i wish to be associated with this "thing" called LOVE. LOVE??? yea, LOVE. It took such a long time for me to realize exactly wat that word meant. I once didn't believe in such a ridiculous idea. To acutally trust the fact that love takes over both your heart & emotions? That love can make u laugh, yet make u cry? That love can turn into Today's Hero, yet Tomorrow's Fool? That love can have u locked as a prisoner, No way to get out as u pled & beg to be set free...yet you have the very key in your possession...Such things I tend to laugh at. I found them hysterical even, some what unreal....until...

...I found myself lookin through the bars of wat was formally known as my heart. i lean my head up against the cold, hard steel as tears began to roll from my cheek & land successfully on the key that seemed so worthless to me. My head is pounding as i continue to rehearse the message that my heart is trying so desperately to convey. I play with the key as i continue to lock & unlock the chamber to this "thing" they beats inside of me. Can i call it a heart when it can not fully function? the system is down but i dnt have the manual. See I gave it to you a while back. Don't know if you read it or not, or maybe u didnt understand it. I can not continue to "live" like this...each day i realize that i am not "living" merely existing. So as i stare at this key, unlock this gate once more, ready to demand wat is rightfully mine. My adrinaline is pumping as my mind frame is determined & unwilling to compromise...As i push open the door ready to take on any obstacles tha may distract me, i can see above the rain clouds. IM FINALLY FREE!!! & as i take my first step to reclaim my heart...i look out into the distance, you appear, i see u approaching me, my heart never felt so strong & lively. You're closer to me now, i can feel you. You're here. I stare at you as you gaze into my eyes. My heart beats steady yet with the force of a mighty lion. I lean in & with a passionate kiss...tears begin to leak from my eyes. As i am once again mesmerized by your aura, i begin to take that exact same step backwards, retreating into my chamber, locking the door never knowing when i would be set free, As your face begins to seem more & more faint the tears now are more rapid...and never a steady pace, replacing the beat of my heart."

dope trill.

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